Day 23

HAPPY FRIDAY!!!! YES! It is finally here! WOO HOO!!!

This is gonna be a hot weekend, record temps everywhere and so I plan on swimming the whole weekend, racking up lots of exercise. :D

Today I want to talk about how we try to negotiate with ourselves or bribe our selves into doing what we know we shouldn't.

One of the hardest temptations I encounter are of my own making. I start to get hungry, I think about food, what I like. I begin trying to tell myself I can just buy, chew and spit. Or, if I eat just one of this or that it will be fine. I consider how I could get away with doing some form of diet cheating.

I am my own worst enemy. These attempts at self sabotage, the inability to fully let go of my need for food, taste , texture, is baffling. Technically I am not starving, my body is receiving enough nutrients. Yes, well below the calorie intake needed to maintain my weight, but that's necessary for rapid weight loss. But WHY do we do this? Why do we, or me specifically, try to talk myself into doing something that I've consciously decided to not do?

This internal battle can be exhausting! It's draining to spend hours thinking about food, constantly having thoughts on how to get around my died and still taste the food. It almost feels like a form of obsession. The longer I do this the more I wonder how drug addicts really get clean. The human mind tries whatever it can to convince us to do what it/we want despite our conscious effort not to take that action.

Of course, if this were EASY nobody would be fat or addicted to drugs. lol!

Anyway, those are my deep thoughts for the day, 0 readers, I hope you have a fun, shady, cool weekend.